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PostPosted: July 3rd, 2008 17:02:50 pm 
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Faction Eight
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I am too lazy to compose an appropriate post here, so instead I will paste one I made for the same purpose 1.5 years and a few defunct forums ago.

Quote:
I propose a game. It is a simple one, one which the members of [Faction Eight] have been playing for longer even than they've been playing with themselves. It's great fun on MSN, and I think it would adapt well to a forum.

Basically, you claim things. Like this: "I claim <thing>!"

Got it? Hooray. The point of this is to acquire the most... whatever, of anyone. Trick is to claim things that other people need to make their things work, see. This should lead to many a wonderful argument about what precludes what. Now, it's typically played with no restrictions whatsoever, but in the interest of preventing this from degenerating into Just Another Spam Thread, I suggest turns be limited to one claim per post, with multi-post strings being strictly forbidden.

NB: There are many, many ways to "win" this game, in that there are things you can claim which give you control of the game, or of "claiming", or of everyone's claims, or of everything that hasn't been claimed, or of the people playing, or whatever. Feel free to try a few yourself. Understand that your cleverness will be briefly noted but your victory wholly unrecognized.

Anyway, I'll go first: I claim language.


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PostPosted: July 3rd, 2008 17:18:06 pm 
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I claim the forum.

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PostPosted: July 3rd, 2008 17:26:22 pm 
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Faction Eight
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I claim all internet service providers. You may own this place, but your power is meaningless unless I allow you access.


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PostPosted: July 3rd, 2008 18:11:52 pm 
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I claim the government and legislate your ISPs into ones more suitable for my plans.

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PostPosted: July 3rd, 2008 19:01:11 pm 
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Faction Eight
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I claim the proletariat, which I shall use to overthrow your government.


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PostPosted: July 3rd, 2008 19:57:29 pm 
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I claim television, to placate the proletariat.

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PostPosted: July 3rd, 2008 21:48:42 pm 
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Faction Eight
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I claim electricity. And I'm shutting it off. Your government is about to have a riot on its hands, sir.


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PostPosted: July 3rd, 2008 21:53:30 pm 
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I claim the strong nuclear force. If you shut electricity off, I can shut this off selectively against any possible rioters.

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PostPosted: July 3rd, 2008 22:23:15 pm 
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Faction Eight
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I claim all cabbages, for reasons that will become clear in due time.


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PostPosted: July 3rd, 2008 22:27:52 pm 
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I claim you, thus claiming everything you claim, by the partial order property of claiming.

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PostPosted: July 3rd, 2008 22:40:23 pm 
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I claim logic, in order to bend it such that the partial order arguement directs things to me.

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And he asked:
Why am I here?
And the reply came back:
Where else should you be?


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PostPosted: July 3rd, 2008 22:47:36 pm 
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Faction Eight
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As I claimed language in the OP, I now exercise my power over it to redefine "me" (retroactively as of just before MH's post) to refer only to the user whose screenname here is "Toast". To recap: Williams owns me, and thus all my claims, which are subsequently redirected to MH via bent logic, and subsubsequently directed back to me via redefinition of pronouns. Net result: I regain control of all prior claims. Also, I haven't made a claim in this post yet. I will do so now.

I claim the act of claiming things.


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PostPosted: July 4th, 2008 10:01:47 am 
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I declare my desire to own the screenname "Toast".

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And he asked:
Why am I here?
And the reply came back:
Where else should you be?


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PostPosted: July 4th, 2008 16:15:06 pm 
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William takes the screennames "Toast" and "MH".

(You have a bootstrapping problem, MH.)

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PostPosted: July 4th, 2008 18:57:29 pm 
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I claim all nuclei of EVERYTHING thus making the strong nuclear force work substantially differently.

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"These coffee makers have got some serious firewalls"


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PostPosted: July 4th, 2008 20:36:21 pm 
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Faction Eight
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Declaring desire is not claiming. Neither is taking. Taking just makes you a petty thief.

I hereby claim all screennames (including but certainly not limited to "Toast", "MH", and "william"), making them my official property.


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PostPosted: July 4th, 2008 22:01:18 pm 
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I claim the Inland Revenue (which might have a different name where you are, like the IRA or something), and use it to take away your official property (although that does lessen your overall tax bill).

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And he asked:
Why am I here?
And the reply came back:
Where else should you be?


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PostPosted: July 5th, 2008 03:10:33 am 
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Internal Revenue Service, IRS. The IRA is the Irish Republican Army.

I claim all names, which includes all screennames.

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PostPosted: July 5th, 2008 13:12:55 pm 
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Faction Eight
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Naw, you can't override previous clames with broader ones. The best you can do is to claim all names which aren't screennames.

I claim Canada.


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PostPosted: July 5th, 2008 17:11:46 pm 
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I claim the Internet service of all universities(which are seperate from ISPs because ISPs are businesses)

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PostPosted: July 5th, 2008 19:59:58 pm 
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I claim The Heavy-Handed Techniques of the RIAA, and use them to threaten every university with massive lawsuits if they do not cut off your access to the TimeFan.


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PostPosted: July 5th, 2008 23:48:39 pm 
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You do realize that if all universities were cut off from the Internet then the people that would suffer most would be those outside universities, right?

Also, I already claimed the government, so your heavy-handed tactics won't work.

Anyways, I claim all elections, so that my control over the government won't be gone next election cycle.

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PostPosted: July 6th, 2008 16:50:15 pm 
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Faction Eight
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Who said anything about cutting off Universities? I was talking about cutting off your access, not anyone else's.

And fine, I'll switch acronyms. I claim the IRA, and use their heavy-handed tactics to threaten universities with et cetera.

I claim the minds of all voters. If those elections are to go in your favor, you'll have to make them blatantly undemocratic. Which increases the likelihood of my proletariat getting off their lazy asses and doing something about you.


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PostPosted: July 6th, 2008 20:46:17 pm 
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You can't make two claims in one post!

I claim the bodies of all voters. Sure, they may want to vote against me, but they aren't going to actually do so in the voting booth.

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PostPosted: July 6th, 2008 23:52:32 pm 
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I claim unregistered voters to convince them not to register lest they fall under your rule.

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PostPosted: July 7th, 2008 17:42:34 pm 
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Faction Eight
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I claim all methods and abilities which might be used to travel through time/bend time/manipulate the medium that is time in general. I will completely restrict access to these things to limit timey-wimey shenanigans from being invoked to jerk me around.


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PostPosted: July 7th, 2008 23:39:47 pm 
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Faction Eight
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william wrote:
You can't make two claims in one post!

Whoops. Didn't notice I'd done that.

Anyhoo, pretend I made one of those claims in this post. Instead.


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PostPosted: July 8th, 2008 01:45:52 am 
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Aoristocrat
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I claim Senator Mitchell, and pacify the IRA.

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PostPosted: July 31st, 2008 03:12:08 am 
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I claim Victory!

All victory. In anything. Ever.

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In fact, the largest number is about 45 billion, although mathematicians suspect that there may be even larger numbers.

It's not a Devil May Cry game unless Dante gets pinned to a wall and/or the ground by his own sword.
Preferably multiple times.


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