TimeFan

It's TIME for a forum about webcomics.
It is currently July 21st, 2018 04:09:13 am

All times are UTC




Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 12 posts ] 
Author Message
 Post subject: Bad Poetry Thread
PostPosted: September 18th, 2007 04:25:27 am 
Offline
Jamist
Jamist
User avatar

Joined: February 8th, 2007 23:29:21 pm
Posts: 1171
Location: Gotham City
This thread is for writing intentionally bad poetry. I'll start (since I can't figure out a way to add indentations, * will represent an indentation):

Your love is like
*ice
Its beautiful crystalline structure
*holds us together until
Spring when it
*melts because there are
So many hot
*guys to draw you
Away
*from
**me

Eh, it's not as good as the original version (which I wrote on a whiteboard, which was then erased, so this version is from memory). My friend responded with this:

Your love is like
*ice
I lick it and then
*my tongue gets stuck

Anyway, here's my current masterpiece of lousy poetry:

I cut myself today
*I didn't have a choice
*I was compelled
It didn't hurt much
*The pain was just an echo
*down a long dark hallway
I guess I'm not as good
*as I thought I was
*at shaving.

_________________
In fact, the largest number is about 45 billion, although mathematicians suspect that there may be even larger numbers.

It's not a Devil May Cry game unless Dante gets pinned to a wall and/or the ground by his own sword.
Preferably multiple times.


Top
 Profile  
Reply with quote  
 Post subject:
PostPosted: September 18th, 2007 04:51:48 am 
Offline
Jamist
Jamist
User avatar

Joined: August 16th, 2007 06:07:17 am
Posts: 1380
Location: Mechanical Engineering
How about bad pick-up lines? You must be ferromagnetic because I'm attracted to you!

_________________
Does this rag smell like chloroform to you?


Top
 Profile  
Reply with quote  
 Post subject:
PostPosted: September 18th, 2007 04:52:22 am 
Offline
Jamist
Jamist
User avatar

Joined: August 16th, 2007 06:07:17 am
Posts: 1380
Location: Mechanical Engineering
Oh, man, I wrote some great poems for high school. Let me see if I can find them.

_________________
Does this rag smell like chloroform to you?


Top
 Profile  
Reply with quote  
 Post subject:
PostPosted: September 18th, 2007 05:16:31 am 
Offline
Jamist
Jamist
User avatar

Joined: February 8th, 2007 23:29:21 pm
Posts: 1171
Location: Gotham City
If you want a constrained
*chat thread for bad
pick-up lines start
*your
**own.

(edited to be in the form of a bad poem, since this is, after all, constrained chat)

_________________
In fact, the largest number is about 45 billion, although mathematicians suspect that there may be even larger numbers.

It's not a Devil May Cry game unless Dante gets pinned to a wall and/or the ground by his own sword.
Preferably multiple times.


Top
 Profile  
Reply with quote  
 Post subject:
PostPosted: September 20th, 2007 04:51:38 am 
Offline
Jamist
Jamist
User avatar

Joined: February 8th, 2007 23:29:21 pm
Posts: 1171
Location: Gotham City
I received this in a spam email (again, unedited, including line breaks):

Land once three men been would years saw.
Where put side sun animals with last.
Place sure thing now back four.

Before find head feet few up down point came last.
Would for below has.
Miles does look if why home words three city.

May do live and place along all important.
Tell time got this enough said look take.
An air i with important white part words.
Want the what we.
Take ways about good get means under off may.

Be to far together this.
Say high little help three small point was.
Whole feet between thing hard.
Enough along place between being let did the.
His when which were.

Man need again next began right above might.
New second should picture father left of his can be.
Himself may while saw here which they.

_________________
In fact, the largest number is about 45 billion, although mathematicians suspect that there may be even larger numbers.

It's not a Devil May Cry game unless Dante gets pinned to a wall and/or the ground by his own sword.
Preferably multiple times.


Top
 Profile  
Reply with quote  
 Post subject:
PostPosted: September 20th, 2007 06:22:36 am 
Offline
Jamist
Jamist
User avatar

Joined: August 16th, 2007 06:07:17 am
Posts: 1380
Location: Mechanical Engineering
Maybe if he were
good
at poetry
then he'd have

a real job.








Nope.

_________________
Does this rag smell like chloroform to you?


Top
 Profile  
Reply with quote  
 Post subject:
PostPosted: September 20th, 2007 10:06:15 am 
Offline
Yorkster
Yorkster

Joined: January 29th, 2007 14:50:51 pm
Posts: 117
Location: Leicester, England
Code:
Your spam is always
   somewhat exciting,
Mine is just ever so
   slightly frightening.
People seem to think
   that my penis is small.
Or that I am
   exceedingly poor.


How's that for bad?


Top
 Profile  
Reply with quote  
 Post subject:
PostPosted: September 20th, 2007 23:07:02 pm 
Offline
Jamist
Jamist
User avatar

Joined: February 8th, 2007 23:29:21 pm
Posts: 1171
Location: Gotham City
Awesome (ly bad)!

_________________
In fact, the largest number is about 45 billion, although mathematicians suspect that there may be even larger numbers.

It's not a Devil May Cry game unless Dante gets pinned to a wall and/or the ground by his own sword.
Preferably multiple times.


Top
 Profile  
Reply with quote  
 Post subject: Re: pants Poetry Thread
PostPosted: June 30th, 2008 12:51:11 pm 
Offline
Faction Eight
User avatar

Joined: June 12th, 2007 23:55:42 pm
Posts: 60
Location: Ohio
I present you with a collection of some of my work. Some of it is intentionally bad; in other cases I achieved pantsness without even trying. Hooray.

Quote:
A Can Of Tragedy

Can of soup
Sitting all alone on the shelf
It falls.
Clatter Clank, Clatter Clank
dent

Quote:
Credit card salesman
Asks me, "What's in your wallet?"
"A sea of despair."

Quote:
Untitled

This poem of mine
Demands some time
Spent by my mind
To fix these lines
(All partial rhymes;
I die inside.
[Who wants some pie?])

Quote:
There's a Bone in My Finger

Imagine if you had no bones
Phase One: Such a wretch you'd be!

And yet, in time, you'd cease to moan,
As the Second Phase brought glee.

With endless joy a skill you'd hone:
You'd flop about, so free.

You'd flop from place to face to zone
You'd flop quite endlessly.

In no time flat, nor round, nor cone'd,
A place in our hearts you'd surely own

And by Phase Three, we'd all agree,
"What a finely flalloping flopper is he!"

Quote:
william c williams

you ate the plums
fuck you
those were for
ev'ryone

what the
hell is your problem
taking
all the fruit

it ain't like
you just invented
such as
photoshop


Quote:
XXX

shouting
XYLOPHONES! XYLOPHONES! XYLOPHONES!
i bow to thunderous applause
as they shoot me in the face
with poisonous electrified stone needles
of gas and bees


Top
 Profile  
Reply with quote  
 Post subject: Re: pants Poetry Thread
PostPosted: June 30th, 2008 23:03:01 pm 
Offline
Aoristocrat
Aoristocrat
User avatar

Joined: September 28th, 2007 23:46:44 pm
Posts: 69
Oh filter. How I love thee.

_________________
"These coffee makers have got some serious firewalls"


Top
 Profile  
Reply with quote  
 Post subject: Re: pants Poetry Thread
PostPosted: July 7th, 2008 16:29:36 pm 
Offline
Jamist
Jamist
User avatar

Joined: February 8th, 2007 23:29:21 pm
Posts: 1171
Location: Gotham City
The William Carlos Williams poem is awesome.

_________________
In fact, the largest number is about 45 billion, although mathematicians suspect that there may be even larger numbers.

It's not a Devil May Cry game unless Dante gets pinned to a wall and/or the ground by his own sword.
Preferably multiple times.


Top
 Profile  
Reply with quote  
 Post subject: Re: pants Poetry Thread
PostPosted: July 21st, 2008 05:43:37 am 
Offline
Jamist
Jamist
User avatar

Joined: February 8th, 2007 23:29:21 pm
Posts: 1171
Location: Gotham City
http://www.qwantz.com/archive/000303.html

That is all.

_________________
In fact, the largest number is about 45 billion, although mathematicians suspect that there may be even larger numbers.

It's not a Devil May Cry game unless Dante gets pinned to a wall and/or the ground by his own sword.
Preferably multiple times.


Top
 Profile  
Reply with quote  
Display posts from previous:  Sort by  
Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 12 posts ] 

All times are UTC


Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 1 guest


You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot post attachments in this forum

Search for:
Jump to:  
cron
Powered by phpBB® Forum Software © phpBB Group